someone prove me WRONG

I've been lamenting today about how hostile our culture is toward children. It seems, on the surface, that we're unbelieveable child-centered. At least if you watch commercials. But its purely from a marketing standpoint. I don't see much evidence of us really cherishing children in this country. I see much more evidence that we're on a neverending quest to make children convenient to us. From "teaching" kids to sleep on their own through abandoning them to scream in the dark, to micromanaging the bejebus out of them to the point that they can no longer behave like children without being scolded. Heaven forbid we should actually take a moment to consider what our children NEED from US. No no. We must constantly assume that Junior is a manipulative little devil, out to squeeze us for all we're worth. I'll end my rant here, because I've been throwing up for 24 hours and the last thing I need to do is get myself all worked up. So let me conclude by sharing this gem from craigslist:

PoMo-Parenting: Teach your children to behave in a restaurant
Reply to:
Date: 2006-05-24, 5:37PM PDT

I am offering a new service to teach your children how to behave in a restaurant. I am an experienced school teacher with an emphasis in the performing arts. This is how it works: exasperated parents pay me to get angry at their children in a restaurant--in order to "teach them a lesson." It may sound a bit drastic but it's been getting great results! I'll work with you to develop a level of aggression (or lack there-of) that you feel comfortable with. I have three different package deals. (1) I merely tell your child (loudly) to be quiet. This package includes a reasonable dinner for me and a guest + $50 + extra if the drive is far. (2) I tell your child (loudly) to be quiet plus I give them a short lecture on how much other people in the restaurant are bothered by their antics. This package includes a reasonable dinner for me and a guest + $75 + extra if the drive is far. (3) I tell at your child (loudly) to be quiet plus you can argue with me and angrily defend your child so that when I walk off you can complain to your child "see! I got in a fight because of you!" This package includes a reasonable dinner for me and a guest + $100 + extra if the drive is far. I will not under any circumstances divulge our agreement to your child. Other lessons are in development and I am open to structuring novel lessons around your given needs. References available upon request. --Pomo Parenting
no -- it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

I suppose you would have to suspect the worst of your children....otherwise what happens if they are behaving much better than before and this crazy broad still comes up and screams at them? And it's always good to see that guilt (I got in a fight because of YOU) costs a little extra. And one more thing. References available? What does the concerned parent look for in hiring someone to scream at your child in a restaurant? Just curious.

8 rubber neckers:

WunEyedDog said...

Uh, that's totally weird.

fat little pug said...

i really have nothing here. thats f-ed up. aside from the strangeness of this, who would pay that woman's fees? i'll scream at your kids for free.

ChiroMum said...

Um, yeah, I'm w/WED...weird. And sad.
Beebabe spent the first night ever away from home last night w/my parents...and I'm PROUD to say that she would settle for no less than wedging herself in my parents bed rather than be banished to the dark guest room by herself.
Sorry I've been MIA for a while...lots of stuff going on in the chirohouse...blegh. How are you feeling?

sweetviolet said...

birdy- weird doesn't seem to do it justice. i think this woman seriously took pleasure in concocting this scheme.

pugly- you're such a giver!

chiro- the beebabe is such an assertive girl. good for her. we should email and catch up!

LoryKC said...

Paying money to a stranger to yell at your kids in public to "teach" them not to yell and act up in the restaurant themselves?! What is the lesson here: "See, sweetie? If you don't straighten up and behave, you will grow up to be like that crazy lady!"

rollerskater said...

that's nutso. i've always been of the "you act up, we leave (where ever we are)" philosophy. it happened to me as a child once, and never happened again. i think a lot of misbehavior is due to the parents lack of interest/selfishness.

sweetviolet said...

lory- ha! too true. i want to know though, can i hire her to come yell at drunk people and people who chew with their mouths open and swear loudly in restaurants? because i honestly can't remember ONE incident where my dinner has been ruined by a child.

skater- a lot of a lot of a lot seems to be due to the parents' lack of interest and their selfishness. that and expecting things their children are not developmentally capable of.

Ayn Marie said...

I couldn't agree more. It's sickening how kids are more of an accessory to parents than a human being.


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