as i explained previously, violet is scared of tape. and i don't mean scared as in....oooohhh it's tape. i mean abject terror. i have decided not to force this tape thing. i doubt it will snowball into a life long phobia, and she'll be fine with tape when she's fine with it.

enter the mother-in-law. the ENTIRE 2 days they've been here i have consistently requested that boxes be taped while violet is sleeping, or outside. there is NO reason to subject her to something she's scared of. everyone complied. until tonight. while carrying boxes into the living room, i could tell that my mother-in-law was planning on taping those puppies up. so i once again stated, "we can tape those when violet goes to bed." she quite deliberately gave her husband the tape and told him (i assume. i didn't hear her...i just saw the exchange) to tape the boxes. he began to comply. i scooped up violet immediately and took her to the bedroom and shut the door.

what do i know? she MUST know better than i do what i should do with MY baby. violet must be taught RIGHT NOW, in the last night she's here, that we're not pussy-footing around her little tape phobia.

of coursed i FLIPPED. at the wrong person. conor is a peacemaker. i marched out into the living room when the taping was done. said "ARE WE DONE WITH THE TAPE?" gathered every roll, and hid it. mature, right? i don't care.

OHOHOHOHOHOHOH. and the missionaries just happened to show up at our door just hours after they had gone to church. what an amazing fucking coincidence. nathan and i thought that would be the perfect time for a beer run. these people are like vultures. they smell a rotting lost soul, and they descend on it. over and over and over and over. making us wish we WERE dead.

10 rubber neckers:

ChiroMum said...

Oh no, you poor thing...and to think, they seemed nice enough yesterday for the mili-second I met them!! At least last night was the final night of the stay, right??

And I really liked that you hid the tape from them...I'd have thrown it at their heads. Seriously. I'm that mature.

How much you wanna bet the missionaries show up on base sometime on Friday?

gone said...

Grandparents don't always use their brains like normal people. I'd say the dynamic between parents of parents has to be, for the first few years at least, quite strained in a general sense. My parents are pretty thoughtful people, but my mom is constantly threatening to feed Gillian meat. If she ever does...Sarah will probably skip the "hide the meat" (whoa, that sounded bad) game and go right to the "gather up all the meat and shove it down the garbage disposer and end this carnivorous love-fest right fucking now!" Now, that game sounds like its right up your alley, eh?

sweetviolet said...

chiro- well they left about 10 minutes after it happened. so if i'd thrown it at their heads perhaps they would have just run out the door right then.

cbt- dear god. the image is even funnier because its sarah. i don't think i've seen her get angry. the idea of dead flesh passing our babies' sweet lips makes us a bit crazy.

WunEyedDog said...

It was certainly an irritating way to end a visit.

sweetviolet said...

um, yeah. sorry about that.

WunEyedDog said...

It's not your fault, sweetheart, it was just a big misunderstanding. My parents love you, they wouldn't do that on purpose. I hope.

Although, they are definitely the harbingers of the missionaries.

Melliferous Pants said...

The missionaries?! Argh! It's been a few years since they've shown up at my place. They seem to find me just before I move, then I scurry off to the next apartment for cover. I'm really not running from them, but it kinda looks that way.

Ps. Sorry you're having in-law trouble, I don't have much experience there, unless you count that alcoholic mother of my ex-boyfriend. Hope you guys get through your move okay.

gone said...

Congrats on your news!

sweetviolet said...

pants- conor's parents said we had to call the ward and ask them to put a note in our FILE that we don't want the missionaries to visit. our FILE??? our f-ing FILE? are you KIDDING ME? how more cultish can you get?

cbt- thanks. i had no idea how you knew. then i discovered conor's announcement.

ariel said...

enter the sister-in-law. congratulations! i'm very excited to be an aunt for the second time. since you gave some good, logical explaining of my parents on the trip to TX, i figured it's my turn. i'm pretty sure: that my mom wouldn't have really cared about when you taped your boxes, that she wouldn't have wanted to make you mad, and that she honestly trusts and respects your decisions as a mother. i know for a fact that she loves you and loves that you are a part of the family. i'm sure it's not easy being the evil mormon mother-in-law, so i just wanted to give my two cents on the matter.

okay 4 cents: i'm sure that we could get more cultish-- i mean really, there's no drinking blood and sacrificing people:)


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