Lunar, Schmoonar

As the day draws nigh, I again turn to the Chinese Lunar Calendar for guidance. Too bad it was wrong last time. Did this thing work for anyone? You have to be careful which ones you use, because some of them don't convert your age to your lunar age, which throws the whole thing off. Since I don't like to do math and stuff, I used this one. Apparantly, V should be a boy. And so should this one. So we shall see. I enjoy the old wives tales gender prediction though. My summary is as follows:

You have a 45% chance of having a boy. And you have a 54% chance of having a girl.

...THANKS! that's so clear, and not at all close to my chances regardless of this test.

And Here's Why...
You are carrying the extra weight out front, so it's a boy. (point of order...my weight doesn't have anywhere to go but out. I'm frigging short.)

The hair on your legs is not growing any faster during your pregnancy, so it's a girl.
(Actually it has slowed dramatically, but that wasn't a choice. Less body hair would be a great result of this pregnancy. Though it might not make up for stretch marks and the floppy belly pouch thingy. I'm not a marsupial here.)

Boys are carried low. You are going to have a boy. (same problem as the first one. My entire body is baby. I sort of look like Mike from Monsters Inc. Just a round ball with some stubby apendages.)

Your feet are not colder than they were before pregnancy. You are having a girl. (I have frigid feet. I don't know that they COULD get any colder.)

You refuse to eat the heel of a loaf of bread. You are having a girl. (I've always refused to eat the heel, but ok.)

Dad-to-be is gaining weight right along with Mom-to-be, which means that you'll have a boy. (Only now he's losing weight. Dangit Conor, throwing off my gender predicter.)

The maternal grandmother doesn't have gray hair (dyed or natural), so a girl will be born. (I haven't seen my mom in awhile, but this is my best guess.)

You didn't have morning sickness early in pregnancy, so it will be a boy. (I got sick like twice, so I'm going with no morning sickness.)

You are not looking particularly good during pregnancy. Therefore, it must be a girl, because girls steal their mother's looks. (So true. I look like cold death.)

Your chest development has not been very dramatic during pregnancy. You should expect a boy. (As Conor says, how much bigger could they get really?)

Since the sum of the mother's age at conception and the number of the month of conception is even, it will be a boy. (26 plus October. Okey doke.)

A needle on a thread held over your belly moves in circles, so you will have a boy. (WITCHCRAFT!)

Your urine is a dull yellow color, so you will have a girl. (Okay, this one is impossible. If you take a prenatal vitamin, it's gonna look like you swallowed a highlighter. But I went with dull.)

You are craving sweets, which means that it is a girl. (It started with Violet and never stopped. It's a sickness.)

Your nose hasn't changed during pregnancy, which indicates a girl. (My nose? I don't really keep tabs on it. I assume it hasn't changed.)

You have been craving meats or cheeses, so it is a boy. (Well I can't argue with that. Never did I want a burger (or 3) like I did early in this pregnancy.)

Your baby's heart rate is 140 or more beats per minute, so it's a girl. (Like a hummingbird in there.)

You must have orange juice every day, so it's a girl. (Not only must I have it everyday. But it must be available for me to drink in the middle of the night. It was the same way with Violet.)

You are not having headaches, so it's a girl. (No, that comes after the birth.)

Your belly looks like a watermelon, so it's a girl. (...or 2.)

You show the back of your hand, so it's a boy. (The question was if someone asked me to show my hands, would I show them palm up or palm down. The problem is that you start thinking about it and overanalyzing it. I'm not sure if it was an authentic response.)

You use the handle, so it's a boy. (....if I pick up a mug. Who picks up a mug by the body? What if it's hot? That's just crazy talk.)