27.2.06

secret ingredient

There is a new miracle face cream. It has been featured on Oprah and EXTRA! as the solution to all your wrinkle woes. The patented TNS recovery complex runs about $130 a bottle. This is what the makers have to say about it:

As seen on the television show
EXTRA! This is Bo Derek's secret fountain of youth for staying a perfect 10 at 50. Derek said she doesn't work out or diet, but uses Skin Medica's TNS recovery complex to stay a perfect 10 on the December 17 Episode of EXTRA.
Introducing the revolutionary tissue-repairing complex, Tissue Nutrient Solution (TNS) Recovery Complex with physician strength NouriCel-MD(tm) containing growth factors found in normal, healthy skin.
TNS Recovery Complex is an enriched nutrient solution bi-product of a patented tissue engineering process for growing human skin from dermal fibroblast cells. SkinMedica TNS Recovery Complex is professionally formulated with the highest concentration of human growth factors available in the market, as well as soluble collagens, matrix proteins and antioxidants.
The active ingredient in TNS Recovery Complex, NouriCel-MD(tm), is a special nutrient solution that supplements the skin's natural ingredients and produces a nutrient-rich environment where skin can develop a healthier appearance.


What are these amazing dermal fibroblast cells?

Glad you asked.

TNS is made from
baby foreskins.

9 rubber neckers:

Anonymous said...

oh my gosh.

Anonymous said...

you should post a pic of bo derek without makeup on....she's not that perfect!

laura said...

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! that's so disturbing.

sweetviolet said...

i love the line in the news article about how the smell makes you want to gag. how about the ingredient list? that makes me wanna gag.

Maddie said...

I can't help but think that people who pay $130 per bottle of baby foreskin to make themselves look younger must be racking up some supremely shitty karma.

Eric said...

WTF???

Norma Shineynickels said...

ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

LoryKC said...

My mother used to tell me that she knew people who'd paid for $100 bottles of moisturizer years ago that contained urine from pregnant women.
Whether it's true or not, I didn't think it could get more bizarre than that.
Obviously I was wrong.

sweetviolet said...

i know that premarin is made from the urine of pregnant mares. maybe there's something to preggo pee?

 

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